The Island of Logic

Link to Story: http://blogs.abcnews.com/politicalpunch/2009/07/if-a-teleprompter-falls-in-the-white-house-does-it-make-a-sound.html

28% of the American people mourn the untimely death of one of the duo of Teleprompters-in-Chief. One of the co-executives died suddenly yesterday afternoon when he fell from the podium to the floor, while the BHO model of the Teleprompter readers was verbally reading his text. He was rushed to the nearest tech bench after the speech was complete, but to no avail. He had succumbed to his injuries, several hours of soldering was not able to resuscitate the Teleprompter-in-Chief. The remaining Teleprompter-in-Chief finished the speech alone with his reader. So far there is no word on the cause of death. There are however two primary speculations. The first is that the Teleprompter-in-Chief succumbed to severe electronic arrest as a result of the BHO Teleprompter reader spilling water on him the night before. There are rumors that current was applied before he was completely dried out. Foul play has been ruled out in that incident. The second theory involves a plot by the Dick Cheney Assassination Squad. The FBI say they are investigating the possible use of a laser cannon by the Dick Cheney Assassination Squad, but said they would not release any more information until the autopsy was complete. The Teleprompter-in-Chief will be lying in state in the Capitol rotunda from Thursday to Saturday. The public is welcome and a State funeral with full military honors will take place on Saturday at noon Eastern. The Teleprompter-in-Chief had served in the first gulf war as the teleprompter for General Schwarzkopf. Some within the administration are saying that despite the dark cloud that hovers over the nation at this time, there is a silver lining. The administration is hoping that with a single Teleprompter-in-chief performing the executive duties that the administration would have a more unified message. The BHO model of teleprompter readers in the past has given confused and conflicting readings when the two Teleprompters did not agree. For example on the campaign trail the one teleprompter had said that as Teleprompter-in-Chief he would not use signing statements, however the Teleprompter that has now passed away, only last month issued a signing statement with the $106 billion war supplemental bill. This includes other promises made by one Teleprompter or the other like “Allow five days of public comment before signing bills” “End income tax for seniors making less than $50,000″ and “Create a $3,000 tax credit for companies that add jobs”. No official word has been given on whether the backup teleprompter reader the Pluggs Model will be performing the reading from now on, but there has been no indication to a Teleprompter reader change thus far. The BHO model uses the latest in 3T (Text To Talk) Technology, and despite the water incident will probably not be replaced.

Tags: Obama, Teleprompter

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